Tuesday, January 25, 2011

A good time to thank a mentor (or even become one yourself)

From Friday's Briefing:


It’s almost the end of January, and I haven’t officially celebrated National Polka Music Month, National Mail Order Gardening Month or National Be On-Purpose Month. But I don’t want National Mentoring Month to pass by unrecognized.
You can celebrate this important month by thanking one of your own mentors (officially next Tuesday, but any day will do) or recruiting a friend to join your volunteer efforts or learning how to become a mentor yourself.

When Sunni Stokeld was a freshman at Baylor University, she learned the importance of having a mentor in her life.
“She helped me with decisions on boys and friends, gave me wisdom when I wouldn’t have gotten good wisdom from my peers,” Sunni says of her college mentor, a Baylor graduate student. “She gave me a different perspective on life in general.”
They were both young Christian women with similar backgrounds and values. They never became best friends, but they would meet once a week and visit on the phone when Sunni needed nonjudgmental advice.
“I felt totally accepted for just me,” she says.
That relationship didn’t just help Sunni. It instilled in her a responsibility to help others.
For years, Sunni has filled the role of mentor to young people — in addition to her role as a middle school counselor at Trinity Christian Academy. She offers mentoring support to students at her school and commits at least 90 minutes a week (though often more) to a young woman she met through church.
When Sunni first started working with Helen, she says her main goal was to make sure Helen graduated high school without getting pregnant. That alone would have broken destructive patterns in Helen’s family.
Helen’s not only on track to graduate this spring; she’s been accepted by two colleges and is a beacon of hope for her immigrant mother and her younger siblings.
Sunni and her husband offer homework help after church on Sundays. An evening each week is devoted to one-on-one time just to visit. Helen talks, and Sunni offers her perspective. Their time is all about Helen.
As a mentor, “you have to earn the right to be heard,” Sunni says, “and you earn that by being faithful and learning about their life.”
Sunni emphasizes that anyone could have filled her mentor role.
“It didn’t have to be me, it had to be somebody.”
Nancy Turtletaub started her mentoring career early.
The Trinity Christian senior has been guiding younger girls for three years already. She spends spring break on mission trips along the Amazon River. Last summer she organized and raised money for a free arts-and-crafts camp for girls from West Dallas.
“I’m excited to do something beyond myself with the privileges I have,” Nancy says.
She currently serves as a volunteer with Voice of Hope Ministries in West Dallas.
“There’s desire in every child to be valued and appreciated,” Nancy says. “To have someone interested in them and what happened with their friends today.”
She spends two afternoons a week with the Voice of Hope after-school program, visiting with kids, serving meals, helping with homework.
“When they go home, they don’t always have a mom who asks, ‘How was your day?’ They talk and talk and are so happy that somebody is listening to them and that someone cares.”
Nancy says that a lot of her friends join her at Voice of Hope — and they don’t need convincing.
“Once you see the need, the response is immediate.”
Tyra Damm is a Briefing columnist. E-mail her at tyradamm@gmail.com.

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