Running

For months I've been training to run the Dallas White Rock half-marathon in Steve's honor.

I am not a natural runner. In high school, the mandatory 12-minute run was more like a 1-minute run, 11-minute walk for me. I always hurt my shins, and my breathing wasn't right, and I didn't like to sweat.

For years Steve has been running, for fun and in races. I never joined him. I would walk at night or sometimes swim, but never run.

Last year I started running and then stopped when the weather turned cold. And then Steve was diagnosed with cancer, and I didn't do any exercise at all. I did lots of running around, but no running.

This summer Liz convinced a small group of us to run in some way to honor and support Steve. Sadly, she hurt her knee and hasn't been able to train, though she is an excellent motivator.

Allison has been my steady running partner. We run for 2.5 minutes and walk for 1, over and over. We've worked our way up a little at a time, and last Friday morning we ran 10 miles!

We ran past grocery stores, restaurants, banks, child-care centers. We ran all the way to a major highway, and then we turned around and ran home.

When we run we talk. It's a great way to get ideas, talk through troubles, set goals and vent when necessary.

Our schedules don't mesh well this week, so I ran 3 miles on my own this afternoon. I knew I would miss Allison's conversation, so I grabbed Steve's iPod. My little iPod Shuffle is loaded with relaxing music -- not ideal for running.

On a day like today, when Steve is feeling extremely wobbly and sluggish, running is a little emotional for me. We both wish he were able to zip up and down Teel Parkway like he used to. I am running for him, but I wish I were running with him.

Well, those emotions were compounded when I decided to listen to Steve's running playlist. A U2 song and a Coldplay song had me in tears. But that didn't last long. A Beastie Boys song came on, and there was nothing to do but smile and laugh. I could so picture Steve singing/rapping along. Later tonight, I'll play it again for the full Steve effect.